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Halo 3 - Five Reasons To Pass Up on This Crappy Game

by PacoDG

eat it baby
I always called Halo 2 the “AOL of First Person Shooters” because of the way it was made so easy for anyone to pick up and play for the most part, even joining and online game was just a button click away. So now over at an AOL sub-site GameDaily they offer reasons why you should stay away from the upcoming monster seller that will be Halo 3 (Copy and pasted below so you don’t have to go to an AOL site):

Who cares?

With over 1.5 million preorders, an aggressive marketing campaign and plenty of hype, Halo 3 is just as important as Brunswick Bowling. Ok, that’s not entirely true. We dug the beta, and playing through the single player campaign alongside three buddies can be a fun time, but we refuse to drink the Kool-Aid for the following reasons…

Shaky Narrative

Halo 2’s single player campaign left us empty and unwilling to “finish the fight”. After bludgeoning Covenant in the original Halo, we grew to despise the Arbiter in its sequel; the good-natured alien that seeks to destroy its former comrades. We keep imagining scenes of it and Master Chief fighting side by side, which pushes us further away from the game. We’d much rather play from the enemy perspective and kill UNSC forces instead of slaughtering more aliens.

Multiplayer Feels Too Familiar

Like thousands of other gamers, we played the hell out of Halo 2’s multiplayer mode, so much so that after nearly three years of constant fragging, we desperately need a new experience. Bungie introduced some cool new weapons into Halo 3, including the Brute Spiker, yet that may not be enough to hold our interests.

People Cheat

Halo 2 multiplayer was sweet until scumbags began exploiting the system, thus ruining an enjoyable experience. Halo 3 will likely suffer a similar fate, and it won’t be long before gamers teleport around the map and pull off other crazy shenanigans.

We Bought Into the Halo 2 Hype

At the time, Halo 2 was the greatest first person shooter for Xbox, featuring excellent multiplayer and attractive visuals. With that being said, we regret awarding the game a perfect ten, especially after dissecting the single player campaign a second and third time. We plan to avoid the hype this time around, and deliver a review that reflects the quality of the product.

Ill give the list one thing, the cheaters, man, that pissed me off, but like many, I am just attempting to have some faith that Microsoft will have some tricks up its sleave to make sure that won’t be as big as a problem as it was before.

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12 Responses to “Halo 3 - Five Reasons To Pass Up on This Crappy Game”

  1. SgtAddy Says:

    So, about the Arbiter, what you’re saying is that, you hate him, but you STILL want to play from the enemy’s perspective and kill marines? Oh, I see, that “kill marines” part. (???)

  2. SgtAddy Says:

    *Last post* I didn’t mean ‘you’ as in 360rally, but AOL :)

  3. qbix Says:

    I hated modders on Halo 2. I really hope they don’t show up (as easily) on this version. I’ll play the hell out of this game for months to come, and I don’t think of it as the AOL of FPSs. That’s an insult to this franchise. Oh well.

    I used to drive hundreds of miles, literally, just to play Halo with whoever threw a LAN party. I did this for a couple years and never once did I get tired of the game and playing the same maps over and over. This time around we are given a buttload of options, forge, online COOP, and the game feels like it’s going back to the roots, something Halo 2 didn’t quite accomplished. The AOL of FPSs my ass. Ok, I’m done ranting.

  4. PacoDG Says:

    Man, I make fun of Halo 2 calling it the AOL of FPS (seriously, my friends know me for saying it), but no matter how many times I say it, it is the one game I play more than any other. Nothing beats a Team Skirmish flag game, nothing, no game has compared to the ease of set up as well as just the ability to jump right into a game and figure how to move around/jump/kill/etc. So yeah, it does come off as an insult, but in the end, it is a good thing it is the AOL of FPS.

    (Note: Well before I was able to afford Live, I went out and bought an Xbox just so me and my brother could do a Lan connect in the house for multiplayer, I think I am more of a Halo nut than I like to admit)

  5. JW Says:

    Wait, wait… they were serious? And people gave me hell for my BioShock on eBay piece…

  6. ShortRoundMcfly Says:

    What morons. There list boils down to

    1. What’s so great about Halo

    2. Seriously why does everyone like it? I want to kill Marines. Also I didn’t pay attention to the storyline

    3. I can’t tell the difference between the multiplayer mode in Halo 3 and the multiplayer mode in Halo 2. They are way too similar. ITS LIKE THEY ARE TWO PARTS OF THE SAME FRANCHISE

    4. People cheat on any game. BUNGIE PUT PEOPLE ON THEIR SERVERS TO CHEAT THEY DID IT ITS THEIR FAULT.

    5. I heard some people were disappointed by Halo 2. I’m going to adopt those opinions, but take it to the extreme and declare that the game and all accompanying sequels are unplayable pieces of crap.

  7. Paul Says:

    Wow ShortRound McFly, that’s exactly what I was thinking. I really couldn’t get over their cheaters thing, almost ALL first person shooters that are popular will have cheaters. It’s bad on Xbox, but a million times worse on PC.

  8. Richard Says:

    Let’s see…poorly written? Check!

    Poorly researched? Check!

    Points out things that everyone already knows? Check!

    I seriously hope nobody got paid to write that piece of crap.

  9. Zach Says:

    Hey,
    OMG. This guy is a total douche.
    First off, amen to the cheatz thing. He’s got no idea that it happens no matter what, much less that Bungie is working in cahoots with Xbox Live to ban every cheating mother effer.
    And even then, he wants to complain about the story mode?! It’s not like Bungie hasn’t come out and said “Our bad!” They made a few rash and jumpy mistakes in 2, and they recognize that, hence them promising us a game far better than we could ever have hoped.
    And as far as the multiplayer goes> Who the eff says you had to play it that much so that it gets that boring you moron? I enjoy a match everytime I get to play, which sadly isn’t as much as I used to, so leave it for a while, and savor it when you get to, douche bag.
    Ok, I’m stepping off the soap-box now.
    Peace in!

  10. WOW YOU ARE FULL OF SHIT. Says:

    WOW DUMBASS GO FUCK YOURSELF. I CAN DISPROVE ALL OF THESE THEORIES EASILY.
    1. SHAKY FUCKING NARATIVE. WTF MAN, IT WAS REPLAYABLE AND HAD A GOOD STORYLINE.
    2 ARE YOU FUCKING WITH ME? ITS A WHOLE NEW GAME, THE ONLY THING IT HAS IN SIMILARITY WITH HALO 2 IS THE STORYLINE AND THE FACT IT IS AN FPS.
    3 OBVIOUSLY YOU HAVEN’T BEEN PLAYING HALO LATELY DOUCHEBAG. THEY FIXED THE CHEATING. THE CLOSEST THING TO IT IS CIRCLE BOOSTING WHICH DOESNT AFFECT OTHER PEOPLE.
    4 BOUGHT INTO THE HYPE? ILL TELL YOU WHY THERE WAS HYPE. THIS GAME WAS FUCKING AWESOME. YOUR TELLING ME THAT BECAUSE ITS A GOOD GAME AND EVERYONE BUYS IT MEANS HEY LETS PLAY A 3RD PARTY PIECE OF SHIT. AND THAT IS YOU, MY RETARTED MEXICAN DUMBASS, ARE FULL OF SHIT!

  11. PacoDG Says:

    Haha, oh man, sometimes, and I mean really random not many at all times, a comment must be deleted. But “WOW YOU ARE FULL OF SHIT” stays. I am not sure if he thinks I wrote the article or what, but the comment gave a good giggle. Kudos for keeping it real with the all caps.

  12. qbix Says:

    There’s a fellow countryman working for GameDaily? I had no idea.

    I still won’t call it AOL of FPSs because to me AOL is such a negative word. I mean, who thinks of AOL and doesn’t think “AOL sucks ass and only internet noobs use it”. Halo is so much better than that. It’s easy to pick up and play because just about every console FPS, regardless of platform, has copied its control scheme. But Halo goes beyond just ease of use. I think the game mechanics, the physics, the maps, the weapons, the story, etc, added up give this game so much depth. But anyhow, I think most people here don’t need to be reminded of Halo’s greatness.

    Paco, you reminded me of a couple anecdotes. I remember three of my friends and I networked two xboxes together in order to play Halo. Nothing special, one might say, except for the fact that we did it inside a van while traveling to Arizona, from San Diego, for a Halo tournament. We were afraid the battery would just give up because we were powering two xboxes, a 32 inch TV, and a smaller 22 inch tv. It worked but the image was wobbly because we were sucking so much power. On the way back we decided to use only one TV :)

    I also remember going to a friends house and running some cat5 cable from his house to his neighbor’s which was 2 houses app art. Needless to say, their wives and girlfriends just rolled their eyes when we did that and the neighbors seemed confused by the blue wire going across their front yard. It was great, but you had to scream extra loud to ridicule the other team after a good comeback in Blood Gulch or Sidewinder.

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